she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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