dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
