D3 body, D1 cock
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
