He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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