so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Randomize