I'm jealous of your bromance
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize