@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
