i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
