Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
