lets start a swedish sibling band together
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
