She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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