Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Gay?
German.
Pity.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Randomize
