My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
