oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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