Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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