I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize