I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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