Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize