porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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