ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
