So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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