nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
The air taste purple.
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