So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
