it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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