Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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