How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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