If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
