all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
found the other keg... it's in the tree
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
