it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
In America we eat man semen.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
