dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
