Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
We are all done wearing pants today
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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