I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
hell yes lets make some ravioli
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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