So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize