We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
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We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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