Swine flu. Run for my life!
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
