carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
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