So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Randomize
