and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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