I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
