You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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