I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
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like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
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He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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