Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
