why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
