Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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