I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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