woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
