i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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