can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
