like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
