Whod you bang
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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