What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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